The Shirt Stealer has been caught! By ME! HA HA!
Here’s how it went down: I actually HEARD Quiet Guy leave his room to go to the bathroom. And I got curious, so I opened his door. And there it was… ALL the clothes that have been stolen! And here’s the weirdest part: they were all draped on mannequins. And they were mismatched with clothes from other cultures, like a spaghetti strap top with a quilt, African tribal clothes paired with a miniskirt, etc. It was like a Fashion explosion, where someone put the wreckage back together who had never seen clothes before. It was kind of amazing, in a totally creepy way.
My Sweatshirt was there, too! Not on a mannequin, though (what, my Tremper wear isn’t good enough for your fashion freakshow?). But it was clean, thankfully.
So Quiet Guy (who, by the way, actually has a lovely speaking voice) walks back in and sees me in his room. But this time he didn’t run. He’d been caught, where’s he gonna go? I asked him why he did it and he told me it was for an art project. He’s trying to end global segregation by showing the world that by mixing fashion we could eliminate social strata. Bad fashion could bring us all together. He was so passionate about it that I couldn’t bring myself to turn him in.
His project will be on display from Thursday to Monday in the Humanitas lobby, and you should really come see it. Once you get passed the creepiness, it’s kind of cool. Oh, and he promised to return everything as soon as the exhibit is over.
No one escapes the law! Or Robin Matthews! Aaaaaand cue the Law & Order music.